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Presence Over Presents: The Gift Your Children Really Need


As the festive season approaches, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of gift-buying. We scroll through endless sales, hunt for the perfect toy, and fill our homes with wrapping paper and ribbons. But have you ever stopped to wonder—are we giving our children too much and not what they truly need?


Looking back on my own parenting journey, I see the many ways I tried to compensate for the challenges of life through material things. Like many parents, I thought that showering my children with gifts would bring them happiness. But over time, I noticed how fleeting their excitement was. The fewer gifts, the more appreciative they were


Too many presents can overwhelm children. They don’t know what to play with first, and sometimes the most thoughtful gifts are discarded in favour of ripping open the next package. This makes them appear ungrateful! Some gifts might even go unused entirely. This isn’t their fault—it’s simply too much for little minds to process. And when everything is handed to them, they miss out on learning about saving, gratitude, and patience.


I realised much later in my parenting journey that the most precious thing I could give my children wasn’t something I could buy. It was *me*. My time, my attention, and my presence.


Moments like reading a bedtime story, playing games, or simply talking about their day made a far greater impact than the latest toy ever could. These experiences teach them they are valued and loved for who they are, not for what they own.


I also came to understand that *investing in myself* was far from selfish—it was essential. Taking the time and resources to work on my own well-being not only made me feel heaps better but also directly benefited my children. By clearing my own emotional baggage, I was able to break cycles of behaviour and thinking that might otherwise have been passed down to them.


In essence, working on myself gave them a clearer path, free from many of the issues and struggles I had carried through my own life. It wasn’t just about healing myself; it was about healing our lineage and giving my children the gift of a stronger foundation.


This holiday season, I encourage you to pause and reflect on what really matters. Consider how you might step away from the pressure of overfilling stockings, giving them more than a few gifts (let's face it most children get more than enough from others, too) and instead focus on filling your child’s heart. Maybe it’s a special day out together, baking biscuits, or cuddling up for a family movie night. These will create beautiful memories that will last a lot longer than any toy will. Who remembers all the gifts you received at their age!


And perhaps it’s also time to think about what *you* need. How can you show up more present, more connected, and more at peace? That’s a gift that will resonate not just for the holidays but for a lifetime.


Because the truth is, our children don’t remember the mountain of presents. They remember you and the memories you created with them.


Wishing you and your family a season filled with joy, love, and presence.


Warm wishes



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